A Pondering Paradox's Palace

I’m not good at poetry, don’t profess to be. So critize to your heart’s content this poem I wrote when I was really overtired.

If you’re wondering how it relates to me, I’ve been listening to way to many of those songs on love by Steven Curtis Chapman and Mark what’shisface (Shwaltz? or something . . . )

I have a deep fear that I could never be a parent because of my lack of patience and temper. I’ve read/heard so many stories of kids who are “scarred” for life by their unsuitable parents . . .

*shrugs* anyway . . . onto the poem:

A harsh word here,

A harsh word there,

Do you realize what you’re doing?

I doubt you even care.

 

Everytime you shout

And then don’t apologize,

Makes another sleepless night

Filled with my lonely cries

 

Everytime you tell me I’m a failure

The words pierce deep within my heart

I feel like I’m a sailor

Lost in a sea of darkness

 

One by one you lay the brick

Day by day my soul transfixed

I watch and cry, why can’t you see?

The things that I was meant to be

 

The bricks you build create a wall ,

The wall you make is now too tall.

 

I can’t see past

I can’t climb  the wall

Instead I turn, at last

I don’t wait for your call

 

Some day, I’ll want to reach you again

Can I leap the wall?

I am barred, the way, from men

My own mind created

 

Did I choose this way?

Or was it you?

Or did both of us,

In the end, construe 

 

We weren’t meant to be

You and I

Anymore than a desert and a sea

 

I’m ten years old, i bed and crying

You last look you gave, was so very cold

My hearts so sore, I think I might be dying

 

I don’t know what you want

But I know I do

I just want you to understand

That I love you.